Sunday, January 13, 2008

Critics' Choice In Review

Since there probably won't be any more awards shows this season, I'm cherishing the Critics' Choice Awards. It was quite entertaining, there were a lot of celebrities in attendance, and it might be the only time some of these people get to make speeches. I'm not counting on any other shows happening. So, I want to recap the show with its best and worst moments.


1. Javier Bardem - He won for Best Supporting Actor (as he should have) and gave an awesome speech. He made a joke about his bad English and people needing a translator to understand him. Of course, his accent is adorable, and he cleans up really nice, so no problem. His speech went like so: "I think something got wrong here. After watching the whole talent in those performances, I feel like I won the lottery. Awards are always a lottery, and I guess I was lucky tonight, but that doesn't mean it's the best work at all. All the performers and the performances there were truly heartbreaking, and I'm just a lucky guy, that's all." He then complimented his fellow nominees. To Hal Holbrook, he said, "Thank you, Hal Holbrook, for your performance. It is something that is beyond any words or any compliment, truly." He called Casey Affleck a "force of nature." About Tom Wilkinson, he said, "I've never seen a crazy guy like that - so funny, so good, so real." And about Philip Seymour Hoffman, he said, "Everything he does is great." Bardem then concluded his speech: "So I guess I'm the lucky one. Thank you for that. I just want to thank the Coens because I've been guided by their talent and their humor and I felt that I had the most beautiful gift in order to belong to the team of No Country for Old Men. And I want to share it with a great friend of mine, a great actor, and the best friend - Josh Brolin. I miss you, bro!"

Yes, I actually transcribed the speeches I loved. Javier Bardem was my favorite part of the show. Loved the shout-out to Josh Brolin. He later bantered with host D.L. Hughley, who asked him what his motivation was for playing Anton Chigurh. Bardem replied, "I was thinking just of Mr. Bush." It got a great reaction, naturally. Hughley praised him, "Somebody with the balls to tell the truth!" Bardem's answer to that? "I don't live here." Pure gold. :)

One more Javier moment. Ethan and Joel Coen won for Best Director, and they weren't there, so Bardem accepted it for them. He called himself the third brother, the Spanish one. He also said that they didn't tell him what to say. "So I can really speak about whatever I want." And he did. He went on to praise Julian Schnabel (his former collaborator on Before Night Falls), and then before leaving the stage, he managed to quickly say, in the most charming way, "For Ethan and Joel!"

I heart Javier Bardem.

2. Eddie Izzard - He presented the award for Best Documentary. When he came out, he wasn't satisfied with the applause he got. "Hey, indifferent applause, excellent." He then went off and came back on to huge applause, with a cutaway to George Clooney and Don Cheadle giving him a standing ovation. I don't know if Izzard made up his spiel, or if someone else wrote it, but it doesn't matter. No one could have delivered it like him. It went like this: "Due to the writing strike, some award show have stopped on TV. This award show different and people can do writing. But Okiedokie from WGA only came at tea time so some speechy talks not so good as other man's. This was wrote in toilet so only first draft and a bit la la. Main talk starts now. Documentaries are nice but not got car chases so poo. People who make them have no pants so please give them cash in bags or golden prizes like in running race. Here follows the goodness in documentaries." Awesomely hilarious. :)

3. Daniel Day-Lewis - He won for Best Actor. Yay! Of course he did, but still, hooray! He gave a great speech, too. He started by saying that it was times like this that he wished he was George Clooney because he always knows what to say. He talked about the craziness of the awards season and how if you're lucky enough to be swept up in it, by the end of it, you're completely unrecognizable to yourself. He said that there was still a nugget of mystery, even after all that, but to talk about it would seem pretentious and self-important. He praised his fellow nominees for exactly that - the mystery of their work. He said, "I don't know how they did what they did. I don't want to know how they did it. I'm just glad of it. And I feel more or less like a spokesman here just saying that we did the best we could do this year, and it seemed to me like there was a lot of wonderful work this year." He continued, "I owe everything to Paul Thomas Anderson, my evil twin brother." He mentioned Paul Dano and told him that Dillon Freasier slapped harder than him. He finished by talking about Paul Thomas Anderson, "My working partnership with him and my friendship with him has been one of the most important of my life. So, I thank you for this, Paul." It was a great speech. I adore Daniel Day-Lewis. He is truly the greatest living actor. So classy and humble. And I loved the jab at Paul Dano. :)

4. Juno won Best Screenplay for Diablo Cody and Best Comedy. (See? I can be succinct.) For Best Comedy, Ellen Page (looking uncomfortable as can be), J.K. Simmons, and Allison Janney went up with a couple producers.

5. Allison Janney - Speaking of Janney, she rocks. She presented the award for Best Foreign Language Film. When she was walking out, they announced her as a nominee for Best Ensemble for Juno. When she got to the mic, she said, with her own brand of funny, clever awkwardness, "They forgot to say Hairspray, too, and I did win in Best Ensemble in Hairspray, but I was too chicken to get up. So anyway, so I'm up here, okay, on with it, all right. I'm here to present the Best Foreign Language Film, so forgive me, I have a lot of foreign names to pronounce. Not that I'm not a fan of a little foreign tongue. (long, awkward pause while Janney looks coy and mischievous) I didn't do that so well, but I tried."

6. The Diving Bell and the Butterfly won Best Foreign Language Film. Brilliant director Julian Schnabel gave a great speech (this is the last speech, I swear!). "I want to thank Sean [Penn], and I want to thank Javier [Bardem], and I want to thank all the actors that are in this room who are so full of compassion and love. And that's basically what I learned from Jean-Dominique Bauby. And the reason that it's such a thrill for me to direct movies is to work with all of you people cause when I'm just painting, I'm just another asshole painting, so nobody needs to know what I think. But if I'm the director, then they listen to me a little bit. Anyway, thank all of you for accepting me in this club here. And it's nice - I think this is the first statue I - I wasn't very good at bowling. Anyway, thanks a lot." I had no idea he was American. I thought for sure he was French. I'm even more impressed now. The only person to mention bowling, too. Awesome guy.

7. "Falling Slowly" from Once, by Glen Hansard and Marketa Irglova, won Best Song.

8. Jonny Greenwood won Best Score for There Will Be Blood.

9. George Clooney presented the first ever Joel Siegel Award (honoring humanitarian work and utilizing celebrity to get things accomplished) to Don Cheadle for his work in Darfur.

10. The last best moment of the show - It happened! The show happened, and it aired!


1. Nikki Blonsky won Best Young Actress for Hairspray over Saoirse Ronan for Atonement. Huh???

2. Hairspray won Best Ensemble. Sure, the ensemble is great, but it won over more deserving nominees like No Country for Old Men and Juno.

3. Julie Christie won Best Actress. NOOOOOO!!! I don't like where this is headed. Supposedly the winners of the acting awards usually go on to win the Oscars. This cannot happen! This is one of those nostalgic things. She's great in it, but it's one of those, "She's older, so we should give it to her for sentimental reasons." She does not deserve to win over Marion Cotillard or Ellen Page. Her part isn't even a lead role! It's supporting all the way. Arg!

4. Absence of winners - While there were a lot of celebrities present, there were some noticeable, and disappointing, absences: Glen Hansard, Marketa Irglova, Diablo Cody, Michael Cera (while not a winner, I was sad he wasn't there), Jonny Greenwood, the Coens, Amy Ryan, and Julie Christie (she couldn't even be there to accept the award she stole). But you know who was there? Brad and Angelina. I know that because they cut away to them every other minute or so.

5. Ahmad Khan Mahmidzada won Best Young Actor for The Kite Runner over Michael Cera. Michael Cera was nominated twice! He was nominated for Superbad AND Juno. How could he lose? Apparently, very easily. Jerks. The only thing I can hope for is that he cancelled himself out because the votes were split between the two movies.

So, as you can see, there was more good than bad. It was fun. I'm holding on to that feeling.

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